Photo credit: iStockphoto.com (Ekaterina Okuneva)
You don’t need to wait to get through a challenging time to cultivate happiness, says Dr. Laurie Santos, who teaches the most popular class in Yale’s history: “Psychology and the Good Life,” and has spoken to the Conferences for Women community.
Plenty of proven, science-backed strategies exist to live happier, more fulfilling lives.
Here are three of Santos’s insights. You can also listen to her conversation with Women Amplified podcast host Celeste Headlee here.
1. Prioritize Nutritious Social Connection
Dr. Santos encourages women to invest in “nutritious social connections,” interactions that truly uplift (like Conferences for Women events!). She uses the analogy of nutritious eating to convey how we can approach our social lives similarly.
How can we foster nutritious social connections? Start by intentionally making time to connect with loved ones. Even a short, genuine conversation with a friend or family member can help combat feelings of isolation.
The key, says Santos, is to “mindfully pay attention to how different kinds of social interactions make us feel and build in the stuff that feels good.” Just as we might avoid foods that don’t make us feel our best, we must discern which social connections lift us.
2. Practice Gratitude Regularly
Santos suggests that gratitude is an easy yet powerful tool that can significantly boost well-being. Research shows that writing down three to five things you’re grateful for each night can increase happiness in as little as two weeks.
In fact, gratitude can be transformative not only for individuals but also for teams. One study shows that fundraisers who received regular expressions of gratitude increased their productivity by 50%. “Expressing gratitude,” she says, “boosts everybody’s well-being all around, including the person who expresses gratitude.”
If you’re unsure where to start, Santos recommends: Create a daily gratitude journal. Reflect on simple aspects of life, like good health or supportive friendships. Beyond this, look for opportunities to thank others directly. Whether it’s a quick note to a colleague or a heartfelt message to a family member, expressing thanks builds positivity. This approach cultivates a ripple effect of well-being and positive energy that can uplift entire communities.
3. Invest in Time Affluence
“If you self-report being time famished,” she says, “it is as bad of a hit on your well-being as if you self-report being unemployed.” Time affluence, in contrast, is a key predictor of happiness, perhaps even more so than financial wealth.
To cultivate time affluence, Santos suggests reframing and maximizing “time confetti.” By reframing, we can view activities that save time—like ordering take-out instead of cooking—as little time-givers rather than just conveniences.
Additionally, time confetti—those small pockets of free time throughout the day—can be used purposefully. Santos recommends creating a “time confetti wish list,” with activities like calling a friend, meditating, or writing in a gratitude journal, so when we find ourselves with an unexpected few minutes, we can use them meaningfully.
Happiness, as Dr. Santos emphasizes, “isn’t just something we’re born with; it’s something that we can use behaviors to achieve.”
By focusing on quality connections, practicing gratitude, and creating a sense of time affluence, we can build a life that not only withstands adversity but flourishes despite it.
